100 Fingers 100 Toes

Merry Christmas!!! Rapid Recap

2012-01-12T09:13:00.006-06:00

Can we say EXCITED?

Looking forward to all of our new adventures.

Salvation

2011-11-28T07:54:00.000-06:00

From birthday celebrations to Halloween to Thanksgiving, we've had a lot going on around here and as always so much to be thankful for. Can I get away with recapping the past 2 months with pictures and no words? Let's see.....

Quick catch up:

*Maija and Sidhe got into the high school they had their hearts set on. Maija will major in Dance and Sidhe will major in Visual Arts. Nothing is final yet, as we're still waiting on letters from a few other choices, but I have a really good feeling about this.

*Finn is swiftly approaching his 16th birthday. I am in complete denial.

*Ruari is right in that grey zone between childhood and full blown adolescence, fluttering back and forth between sweet smiles and moody eye rolls. She took the time to help set up the Christmas village the other day, carefully positioning the houses and stores and all the little villagers in very specific locations. I made sure to enjoy it, to treasure it really, because I know that next year she might not be so eager. Sidhe and Maija have already taught me that things will change very quickly from here on out.

*Nuala is really exploring letters and writing. She has remarkable penmanship. She is also quite keen on sign language and shows me all sorts of signs that she learns at school or asks me to teach her new ones. Thank goodness for Google!

*Oscar told me the other night, "Mom, I love you 81.....PLUS forever". A few weeks ago while we were driving in the car he asked me if zero was a number. I actually tear up a little when I think about them going to school full time next year. I'm not joking, there are tears.

*Saoirse. My persnickity little stubborn bunny. Wow. She has entered a full blown Princess stage (despite us not watching many of those Disney movies) that for some odd reason is being enthusiastically encouraged by yours truly. What can I say? I'm a sucker for a Princess apparently. Who knew? She's not a baby anymore, not by a longshot, but it's okay. She is totally delightful as she is right this second. Oh she is a funny one.

*Me. Finally decided to deal with the depression that I've been struggling with for the last year. I'd like to say that it's over, that I won, but unfortunately it doesn't work that way, so instead I will just say that I am working on it. I am working on forgiving myself, I am working on loving myself, I am working on enjoying my life and living in the moment one day at a time. I am working on healing myself. Fortunately I have the most wonderful and amazing support system around. This family has helped to hold me up and has been an extraordinary lifeline and I can't tell you how much my heart swells with love and gratitude just thinking about how lucky I am to have all of these people in my life.

*Brendan. I have no words. He is perhaps the most loving, patient, generous creature I have ever encountered. They don't make many like him and I still have no idea what I could have ever done to wind up right where I am. Probably best not to ask many questions. Probably better to just go with it. I love this man and I am still learning new things about what our love is capable of.

Today is Ruari's birthday and so we have a cake to bake and some gifts to wrap. She really is quite an amazing young lady and I can't wait to celebrate with her when she gets home from school.

Hard to believe that our "little one", our "little Ro" is turning 12 today!

Fall Hair Updates And Other Nonsense

2011-10-19T12:59:00.006-05:00

Fall always sweeps in the crafty critters around here. I've picked up the needles and carried right along as if I never set them down. There is art work everywhere you look around in this house. I'm not even sure what to do with all of it.

I love it when these girls will let me take their pictures. It doesn't happen too often and is usually accompanied by some grumbling and eye rolling, but that only makes me love the end result even more. Middle school girls. It wasn't so long ago that they were little kids themselves, and I know I say it all the time and I must sound like a broken record, but please remember that time will not slow down. Kids grow up much faster than you think they will and certainly much faster than you'd like. There is no going back.

I love hanging out with them, they are so much fun, and after a long day of baby duty it is nice to settle in with just a few of the older kids, even if it's just for a couple of minutes. They are so smart and funny and it's interesting to hear their ideas and their perspectives on things.

Sidhe and I recently decided to flat iron her hair. It's the new thing. And while it takes about 30 minutes each time, I told her I'd help her as often as I could. Plus I think I can get it down to 20 with a little bit of practice. And eventually she'll have to enlist the help of her sisters, Maija already offered, but can I just tell you how hot the iron is? I mean, it's HOT. We'll keep practicing.

Ruari was kind enough to let me take some pictures of her this morning, sporting her new haircut. She is off to a great start in 6th grade and I love that she gets to have one year together with Sidhe and Maija before they move on to high school. The past 2 years they've had different schools and separate schedules so it's nice to be back on the same page.

Of course nothing says fall better than baked goods. Our neighbors brought us an apple pie the other day and it was delicious. It was also gone almost immediately, everyone loves pie!

Oscar and Saoirse have been hanging out a lot more lately. Reading books, playing dinosaurs, stuff like that, and while there's still quite a bit of bickering and the occasional pinch or foot to the face, I've noticed them engaging in quite a bit of peaceful creative play that involves problem solving and negotiating. It's really lovely to witness.

Maija was insistent upon going much shorter than usual and really wanted some layers. I think she knows what she's talking about.

The hairdresser asked me if I was her sister. Ummmm. No, but you did just get a bigger tip you crafty hairdresser you.

Otherwise, it's life as usual around here and I am grateful for it as always.

Everyone is at school and this little girl is trying to convince me that she doesn't require a nap today, but I'm not so sure....Time will tell.

The Harvest

2011-10-11T10:02:00.012-05:00

This picture was actually taken 2 years ago when the twins were still toddlers....

Looking back at old photos today has gotten me excited about taking some new fall shots this year, but first we must decorate and celebrate the harvest.

I've been feeling the tug and pull of my crafter's heart lately and have embraced it fully. Big things are happening in my craft room presently. Tons of organizing and sorting as I gear up for the Holiday craft rush. I can't believe how excited I am to finally get things arranged properly. I'll take some pictures of it soon, but for now a basket of knits will have to suffice. We're busy around here, which is probably why I only post once a month nowadays and don't feel like typing much, but it's a good sort of busy....

One year later and I'm still trying to let go. Forgiveness is perhaps one of life's greatest challenges.

Fall is pretty much my favorite.

We need to start preparing our costumes (this picture is also 2 years old).

As is this...

Can you tell I'm getting excited about the next few months?

And would you ever believe that the time has come to get serious about high school for these two lovely ladies? My heart swells (and aches) just thinking about it....Seriously, weren't they just in kindergarten?

I don't have too much time to feel sad it about though because not only are we about to enter the holiday season, but there are also a bunch of birthdays coming up. I promise I'll take tons of pictures.

Easy

2011-09-12T13:51:00.000-05:00

Found Nuala in the kitchen this morning half way to a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. She was making it look easy. She was making it look like she'd been doing it for years.

As if to say, "Oh no big deal mom, can you please find me some jelly? The Strawberry is all gone and Grape will simply not do, thank you darling."

I was impressed with her resolve, but also a little surprised to find that a simple twist tie nearly got in the way. Seems like quite a bit of work in order to get around such a small obstacle.

But that's exactly what life is like sometimes. There are always going to be obstacles and we are hopefully going to be finding new and creative ways to hurdle right over them.

Looking at my daughter's nutty knuckles and the shards of plastic bread bag shredded and strewn about the kitchen this morning I had to wonder why we make it so hard on ourselves when it could be so easy.

Well, almost.

Hello 32, I love you. I am ready for you, I've been waiting for you for months now. 31 was rough (no offense 31 but if 32 doesn't punch you in the face, 33 is right around the corner so get LOST, this from a pacifist) and I'm ready to get on with the show. I'm ready for some easy.

Don't get me wrong, I know that all the hardship of the last year has changed me for the better. I know that I will look back on it one day and feel peaceful, probably even grateful that I got to travel the various paths of this hidden and sorrowful landscape. Grateful that I took the long way across even though there was most certainly an easier alternative. I know that during the difficult times in life we learn more about who we are and where we are going, and that these trials help us to truly embrace and appreciate all of the good times and all of the easy.

But damn I feel like I've been trying to use a kiddie scissors for way too long now to get around a seemingly simple twist tie. I swear there better be one mother of a peanut butter sandwich waiting on the other side of this because I am starving. Crunchy please, hold the grape with a double side of easy.

Best birthday ever once again.

Nuala and Oscar started back at their Montessori school and are in heaven, Saoirse cries the whole way home after we drop them off. "YOU BUCKLE ME OUT!" she hollers in between her sobs. Sheesh, put your 2 year old in underwear for a few days and suddenly she thinks she's in the big leagues and starts getting all bossy-mc-boss-ster on you from the back seat (*hahaha, yeah right she's pretty much been mcbossy for a while now and who are we kidding, she IS the big leagues, they all are). I hope she soon learns to enjoy the perks of being an only child for a few hours every day.

Otherwise life carries on in usual and predictable ways (which is pretty much just my generic way of saying that the typing part is over now).....

Yes, life as usual indeed. Water fountains for bare feet and foreheads for bed tumbles, on with the show please I seem to have fallen in love with this routine.

And as a birthday present to myself I decided at the very last moment (think 32 minutes until start time) to run a 5K this past weekend. Oh how I miss running. 26:12 with an open heart.

Let's do big things this year okay? Big, glorious, easy things.

I'm ready right now.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-08-31T08:54:00.004-05:00

Alternate titles include One Big Giant Photo Bomb and Let's Get On With The Show.

Or how about The First Day of School?..........

Real Quick

2011-08-06T21:37:00.007-05:00

Micah is in Michigan for the next two weeks and I am already missing him. We took a quick ice cream break the other night before he packed up to leave (see his ice cream mustache?) and I naturally thought that a few pictures were in order.

*Gotta love that parking lot landscaping*

*Here's one I edited, it's a bit pale faced*

I wish that I was a) extrememly interested in learning how to edit photos and b) the sort of lady who had tons of free time to then take that interest and apply it to every single photo, because I can see what I would change and the things I need to work on (ahem, skin tone and white balance).

For now let's just say that this kid is a major cutie and leave it at that shall we? Micah, I'm positive that you are having fun on the shores of Lake Superior, but I want you to know that I miss you nonetheless. Have fun on your many adventures.

*Gosh, he really is just super amazing and 2 weeks is going to start feeling like forever pretty soon*

Worth It

2011-08-03T21:01:00.003-05:00

Last week the Mr. and I stole away to Door County for a quiet weekend getaway. What can I say? We had a great time. I discovered a yarn shop that motivated me to start knitting again, a coffee shop that made the best chocolate frappes you would ever want to sip on and a beautiful stretch of Lake Michigan that everyone should get to explore at least once in their lifetime.

Plus. Did you know Door County is famous for their cherries? Who knew?

In case I haven't mentioned it in a while, I simply adore this man. I might just be the luckiest for he is surely the best. Happy Anniversary honey.

*Here's the new scarf project I started a few days ago*

The other night I was laying in the front yard taking pictures of the sky when suddenly Ruari was above me with a questioning look on her face.

"Aren't you embarrassed?".

"No. Look at the sky.".

Soon enough we were both laying in the grass not worrying about what anyone else thought about us.

Otherwise it's just life as usual around these parts.

*Making progress.....*

*I finally made it back to the salon for a trim and a flat iron*

*Less than 3 hours later I kissed that pretty salon hair goodbye*

It was totally worth it though because I got to party underwater with this little lady. All summer long Nuala has been studying the other kids at the pool as they dive in and out of the water. I felt like a lousy mom since it was obvious that many of her peers have already earned honor roll status at swim school while Nuala hasn't had so much as a rec class.

What she lacks in formal training she more than makes up for in determination.

Micah took the swim test at our usual swim park at least 14 times before they finally passed him. You should have seen him on the day that they finally granted him a password, beyond ecstatic, and I was so proud of him because it takes courage to keep trying something after being told no a few times. He passed at the Y and at neighboring pools and even at the Quarry where you know they have strict rules on account of it's as deep as, well, however deep a quarry is.....but for some reason our pool just gave him a really hard time. He just kept right on trying. I know grown ups who would have given up, but not him.

At the "high dive pool" as we like to call it since it's the only pool in our area that has one, he didn't even have to take a test, he could hardly believe it and was thrilled to have a go at it.

Tomorrow is Friday, now go out and mess up that pretty hair do, it's worth it, I promise.

Wordless Wednesday

2011-07-25T22:03:00.007-05:00

Once again these pictures have been sitting here waiting to get "published". Waiting for words, but I don't have enough time to do them justice so I hope they tell you enough of a story on their own.

*My normal breakfast lately*

*Remember Oscar's little tag quirk?*

*Lucky for him a lot of shirts have a lower side seam tag nowadays*

*Braids are all the rage around here lately*

*Especially since they result in this*

*I am so happy to have a full house once again*

*I will learn how to use my Speedlite, I can definitely see how it will come in handy*

*Just when you thought we were sick of the beach.....*

*This caught my eye after I had spent 48 minutes chasing 3 non-listening toddlers around the children's museum. I laughed a little bit actually*

Happy Wordless Wednesday everyone.

100 Pictures

2011-07-18T08:41:00.004-05:00

A brief morning storm is best followed up with a party in the driveway.

Don't forget your rain boots.

If it starts to rain again head for shelter.

I am playing a massive game of catch up here. Summer is pretty much just slipping through my fingers.

I never get tired of it. Summer.

We went to Chicago and stopped along the way so that Nuala could ride a pony. She is obsessed with horses right now. We talked about it for days and laid it on really thick on the drive down. As it turns out, you should probably call ahead...

A kind lady let us at least walk around to the back pasture and feed the ponies some grass through the fence.

When the sobbing continued as soon as we were back in the car we pulled out some Cheese Castle cheese bread but that girl really had her heart set on a pony ride. Lesson learned.

Hello Field Museum.

Nuala finally got to ride her pony.

She was adamant that one ride was simply not enough.

Brendan surprised me with a flash for my camera, a Speedlite 430, yippeeeee. Now I just have to figure out how to use the darn thing.

Discovery World. Last time we went Oscar got "lost" for 10 minutes. Security found him in the aquarium, turns out he really really wanted to see the fish. This time we had a nice chat beforehand about staying with the group and we also made sure to get him to the aquarium in a timely fashion.

The lake.

Yet another aspect of summer that I will never get tired of.

As we were leaving the lake we spotted 3 cranes along the side if the road and of course I was fumbling for my camera and trying to get a decent shot out of the window and totally holding up traffic in the process.

I never did get a good shot, but it was still exciting for a city girl like me.

Most importantly.....

The kids came home from their trip out east.

Of course Maija left about an hour after that, but it was still nice to have all 8 of them under one roof again!

Michaele and Nico left for France yesterday, heading home after their nice long visit. When they come again next summer the kids will get to meet their new cousin. We are so excited about this.

Speaking of cousins....

My grandma Kate's side of the family had a nice big reunion picnic this past weekend.

So there you have it, I think we're all caught up now and it only took 100 or so pictures......

The Good Life

2011-07-10T07:41:00.012-05:00

Our trip to the lake was quite possibly my favorite day of summer so far, and I'm not big on playing favorites (yeah right, I'm always asking the kids what their favorite anything is~ice cream flavor, moment of the day, book chapter, you get the idea) but the summer has been going by so fast and I want to try and enjoy it all so much that it would be nearly impossible to pick a favorite adventure out of the mix. So I won't.

But if I had to, then this day trip to the lake would be in close competition for taking the cake. I'm not sure what it was, or what happened to make this day in particular so special, but I know by now that it's best not to argue or second guess these things. It was just one of those days. One of those shiny good life days when everything is especially sparkly and you wind up hitching a ride on cloud nine all day. No need to argue, just hop on the darn cloud and enjoy the floating.

It turns out that the lake is about 1000 times cooler than the pool. It didn't have sprinklers or twisty slides or diving boards, but the kids were still thrilled. Turns out the lake has something even better~Fish.

And Miss Thrill Seeker herself was very intent upon catching and keeping close watch over them along the sandy shoreline.

Even the ones who no longer required such close supervision.

I tried, I really did. There were lots of little talks about maybe not getting too friendly with her half fish body buddy. Reminders. Knowing looks. Maybe even a scolding growl or two (half heartedly of course).

She was just too fascinated though and in the end her curiosity won.

Curiosity and hand sanitizer go really well together.

It was a beautiful day for our sandy adventure and I think we all needed a bit of what the beach was offering up that day, a calming sense of peace that smoothed over the rough bits and left us all feeling rather refreshed.

Even the cool teenager who spent a lot of the day in the sun with a book and an iPod agreed that it was a wonderful day.

And what better way to follow up an amazing day at the beach than getting dolled up for a dinner date with the Mr.....

Dinner was delicious.

But the pie, oh the pistachio pie.....Yes. It was a very good day in this good life of ours.

A few days later I got a chance to sneak away with Maija and Micah to brave the rides at Six Flags.

It was everything I knew it would be and maybe even a little bit more.

I didn't bring along the big camera, just my teeny tiny point and shoot but we still took lots of pictures.

These water rides are SCARY. I went on this one and nearly broke my elbow (I'm getting too old for this type of fun) but Micah loved this slide and didn't mind going alone.

By the end of the day we were seriously tired out but in a good way of course. Good and goofy.

Oh and it turns out that the Cheese Castle is now an actual castle. I was sort of sad about this and felt nostalgic for the days when it was just a shed attached to another shed with yet another shed out back.

We're going back to the lake tomorrow and more importantly Finn, Sidhe and Ruari are coming home! They've been gone for 3 weeks now and it's beginning to feel like forever, we're all excited to welcome them back into the fold. It's nice to have a vacation, but it's also nice to get back to normal and "normal" around here means having all 10 of us together under one roof.

Super Readers

2011-07-07T15:23:00.010-05:00

Micah signed up for the summer Super Reader program today and then spent the next 3 hours with his nose in a book.

I'm cool with it.

We ventured to the downtown library which is just gorgeous (we're talking take your breath away type of beautiful) and the kids settled in to enjoy the children's section.

Saoirse spent no less than 10 minutes sitting in this exact spot reading to herself and somewhere at about the 8 minute mark she giggled very softly and murmured to herself. Stopped looking serious for a moment and shared with us the joke she had discovered within the pages of her carefully selected Dora paperback. It was priceless.

And then she resumed her studies. Studying is not to be taken lightly at the library, oh no siree.

The twins on the other hand were the rabble rousers of the group and opted for the train table instead which naturally lead to the click clacking of wooden engines and the handful of squabbles over who was the true train yard master. Saoirse would peer over her should from time to time with a disapproving look as if to shush them.

Nuala decided to let Oscar have control of the rails in the long run.

And here in the land of a million books, in a marble palace of delight and splendor.....

She dove right into the classics. A million choices and yet somehow I wound up reading (and let's use the loosest definition here shall we, because I could barely bring myself to paraphrase this awful First Reader) Scooby Dooby Doo. The horror.

We had a great adventure though and I was reminded that we need to get to the library more often.

Which shouldn't be a problem with all these little Super Readers running about.

Remember when I told you that Nuala is a bug girl?

This morning I dressed her up for a bit of a "staged" photo session, as staged as they get around here anyways (meaning I did her hair, choose a specific outfit, threw in a necklace just for fun and even wiped any left over breakfast from her cheeks) and we hit the back deck for some great morning light.

Within 2 minutes she spotted a beetle cruising along below her bare toes and of course the "session" came to a complete stop.

Which truth be told was perfectly fine with the both of us. I much prefer capturing a story anyways.

And this little bug collector has lots of stories to share.

Today's story ended in tragedy when the beetle decided that he'd had enough and summoned all his strength to half jump half fly right over the patio ledge. As you can see, Nuala had some fairly strong feelings about his hasty departure.

Not even the idea of watermelon could cheer her up.

*Totally random moment here: Dear Ruari, your plants are thriving. We miss you. Come home soon!*

AND what about the boys you ask?

Oscar sure is happy to have one of his brothers home.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that perhaps he did miss Micah just a little bit after all. Sisters are wonderful but there is something special about brothers I tell you.

We're heading to a nearby beach again tomorrow morning and I still have to pack our bags. Hopefully I'll take a picture or two of what the day has in store for us....

Home

2011-07-05T22:13:00.000-05:00

Maija and Micah are home and once again my heart is nearly full.

Beach Bums

2011-07-02T22:17:00.000-05:00

There's this beautiful beach fairly close to our house. We go there every summer to swim and get sandy. I don't really feel like talking about it but I assure you we had fun.

*Michaele and Nico came with us. They are adorable.*

Making Peace

2011-07-01T16:37:00.012-05:00

Oscar turned 75 a few days ago. Oscar the custard stand. We were all more than happy to celebrate the special day with dripping cones. Happy Birthday old friend.

This whole melting custard all over the place thing is so totally outside of my comfort zone, I'm usually all about neat little scoops in plastic dishes with bright red spoons, but for whatever reason I decided to go with the flow. I'm sure that the scene was quite comical as I tried to help all three of them with their cascading cones. There was just no way to get even just one lick ahead of the mess and we were covered in custard in no time, but it was nothing that a little bubble bath action couldn't handle (plus I had to wipe them down from head to toe before we could even get back in the car) and I learned that perhaps going with the flow isn't as hard as it seems sometimes.

We made our inaugural trek to Cool Waters. Now that the new water park near our house has been reopened we haven't felt the need to trek it all the way out here, but the babies loved it.

And really? What's not to love?

Oscar has really surprised me this summer with his love for the water. He can be rather particular at times about certain.....hmmmm how would I say this.....tactile? experiences. Last summer he was more than nervous about the water but this year he is turning out to be quite the little water beetle.

*Have I ever told you about how very serious this Skittle can be?*

Nuala on the other hand has always been a fish in the water, not to mention a thrill seeker. She went down this slide at least 23 times and every single time she would spring from the water with a wild grin on her face and proclaim to the every one in the shallow end, "I LOVE THIS SLIDE!!!" Every. Single. Time. And she really meant it from the bottom of her sweet little fish heart.

Fish are gross sometimes.

But man alive I could just gobble her up. Her and I are in a groove right now, our relationship is sort of stretching out it's wings and getting a better feel for the expanse of it's true width. It's really extraordinary when you think about it, this whole parenting thing. This realization that we will be stretching out into this relationship for many years to come. The idea that our wingspan will grow wider, taller, stronger for as long as it can.

*Poor baby has had some adventures this summer and has the skinned knees to prove it.*

Last night we went out to our favorite little pizzeria. I was nursing a bit of a broken heart and needed a little time away with my Mr.

Remember that marathon I've been dreaming about for the better part of the last year? The one that is taking place in SanFrancisco in 4 weeks? Yeah, about that.....

A few weeks ago as I was coming in from a mild 4 mile run I pulled something in my thigh and it has only gotten progressively worse since then. I could bombard you with all the boring mumbo jumbo, the runner's lingo, the PT's advice, the course of therapy I am struggling through, but let's just cut to the chase.....it appears that this injury will prevent me from running anywhere in the near future. Again, I will spare you the long version and just say that I am sort of a little bit devastated about this. I have not made the official call yet and am popping Ibuprofen like crazy, making nice with the torture roller and even gritting my teeth through deep tissue massage (holy freaking PAIN) in an effort to heal magically overnight, but in my heart I know that we might have to move to Plan B which is a marathon in Madison this fall. I'm not sure I'm ready to trade yet. I had such high hopes for what I was going to accomplish in the Bay, way more than 26 miles, and the idea of giving that up is really difficult to process right now. Not to mention the fact that I've spent the last 9 weeks training my butt off for nothing (except maybe a cute butt of course) and even if I can heal in time for the next marathon it means that I will have to start all over again and let me just tell you these last 9 weeks haven't exactly been a walk in the park!

Lucky for me I have the best support team around. I will count my blessings. I will reorganize my plans. I will hold positive vibrant intentions and I will RUN A MARATHON just as I told you I would. I will make peace with this eventually. One way or another, we WILL walk where the road meets the sun. I promise.

And on the bright side, look at what my trainer just whipped up for dinner tonight? What did I tell ya about my support team? What did I say about having the best partner on the planet?

This Morning

2011-06-30T21:24:00.001-05:00

You know when you're in the house early in the morning and suddenly there is a quiet stillness that sneaks up and takes you by surprise? And you have to put down whatever it is that you are preoccupied with to simply take a look around and bask in the glow of the moment because it is calm and easy.

Maybe you'll find your 2 year old reading to herself in the sun room, totally engrossed and content. Maybe you'll find your 3 year old twins in the midst of a semi-organized game on the top bunk, one that you of course can't quite seem to figure out but they understand the rules and are giggling peacefully as they play.

Maybe you'll just have one of those mornings where the world is yours for the taking. Maybe.

One of those mornings when you sprawl out and enjoy yourself fully, living in the moment and not worrying about what comes next.

One of THOSE mornings. Maybe.

After all our yawning and stretching we set out for the pool. As I was unloading the supplies and setting up the stroller Nuala started telling me all about the cool something or other she saw on a tree.

"Mom, mom, mom, I see something. I found something. What is it? I don't know what it is mom. Look. Look. LOOK. Mom......Mom.......MAAAHHHM!!!".

I of course was having one of those auto pilot mom moments, you know what I'm talking about. One of those moments when you're multi tasking, juggling too many things at once, and so you wind up sounding like this....."Mmmmm hmmmmm. That's nice. Ok honey. Hmmmmmm. Wow. Neat. Mmmmm hmmmmmm", when you have not in fact even looked up from whatever it is that you're doing. Kids usually always know when you're faking it and after a while Nuala nearly gave up on me, but once I had all our gear in order I decided to go look at her big discovery so that she would know that even auto pilot mom has a shining moment every once in a while.

I'm really glad I did too because she had found the biggest hairiest moth ever. Nuala is one for bugs, she is always asking the big kids to overturn rocks in the back yard and digging up worms. Not a day goes by when she doesn't come running over to me with something wriggly cupped in her hand just to give me a peek, but she was not willing to get to close to this guy and kept a very safe distance. Although at one point she did reach out with one finger and contemplated touching a wing. I mean, it did look very soft.

We wound up going to the pool twice yesterday and had to check on our friend a few more times before the day was out.

This one cracks me up with her absolute disdain for sand. She paced around the edge of the playground but just couldn't bring herself to cross the divide.

By the time I finally convinced her to dip her toes in it was time to leave again.

Permanent marker. Kids love those things. Enough said.

Brendan was out of town yesterday and so it was just me and the three littles. We made the most of it.

Despite the fact that I said we were going to have ice cream for dinner, I did actually follow up with some pizza. Yep, pool pizza, see there's nothing to this single mom thing.

I actually was a single mom once upon a time and so I know exactly how lucky we are to have found the life that we have together. I'd like to think that I could do anything on my own and I probably could, but I certainly wouldn't want to. Life is a whole lot of wonderful when you are sharing it with a partner and I can't wait for the Mr. to get home tonight.

*Oscar was impossible to shoot last night so Kermit is standing in for him*

Yes it was a very full day, one that at the very end even included some rare reading time for yours truly.

And now here we are, it's morning once again and we are stretching our way into another day of adventure. Morning cartoons anyone?

I think it goes without saying, but I love this life, these kids, the path that we are on together.

I wouldn't change anything, not a single thing because every moment before this was leading here.

Every moment was leading me to this morning.

Reminders

2011-06-28T23:02:00.009-05:00

Reminders.

They are everywhere. A few weeks ago I had a brilliant idea to create a little makeshift vanity table so that I'd no longer have to apply mascara in the land of rubber duckies and frog potties. Luckily I happened to have a beautiful sewing table gathering dust in the craft room that seemed to be dying for some love and attention. One mirror from Target later and voila, I had created a bit of space just for me.

Well, me and Dora and Swiper and some other random lady I've not been properly introduced to.

Plus Nuala seems to be fairly smitten with the new arrangement and I keep finding her little finger prints all over the mirror and pretty much everything else the table has to offer. Nail polish bottles, eye lash curlers, tubes of lip stick and mascara.....she is fascinated by all of it. In the beginning I assumed that it was just because of the novelty, but I still find her at the mirror at least once a day.

We have a quiet house for the next few weeks as the older kids are all away on various adventures with various grandparents. It's always strange to have the household whittled down to only 3 children.

Reminders, yes they are everywhere and what could be a bigger reminder of childhood than a melting popsicle? We've taken the whole popsicle thing to a whole new level around here this year and I can't buy them fast enough. Plus, no body likes the purple ones (I can occasionally persuade Saoirse) and so there are at this very moment about 3 half empty boxes in the back freezer that have been raided of all their orange and red treasures and about 50 purple popsicles laying around loose and lonely.

***See this face? Happens when her Dada gets home from work each afternoon.***

I can't blame her. He is pretty wonderful.

Have I mentioned that I'm training for a little thing called a marathon? Did you know that training for such an event will eat up pretty much any and all free time you have? I'm not sure about you, but over here in the land of 100 Fingers 100 Toes, we're not exactly swimming in oodles of free time to begin with. Brendan is being an absolute gentleman about the whole thing and holding down the fort each time I go to lace up my running shoes and hit the road. I would never be able to do any of this without his support.

And I'm not even going to make a fuss about how at less than 5 weeks out from the marathon I am now nursing an IT band injury that made it impossible for me to finish 4 lousy miles yesterday. Nope. I'm just going to remind myself how amazing this whole experience has been so far and stay focused on the positive.

Of course the only way to up the popsicle ante is to choose a flavor and select a cone.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?", Nuala all but bellowed at the nice little ice cream scooping teenager behind the counter when asked which type of cone she'd prefer, making it rather obvious that we have not in fact sampled many of the 31 flavors recently. I think it was maybe our second time there in her entire life. She's getting the hang of it though.

I stood there watching them, ready to interrupt at any moment, ready to swoop in and "help" the situation along because how on earth would a 3 year old be able to communicate with a teenager after all? Nuala just gave me a look that said, "back off lady I'm handling my business" and then pointed to the regular cone with one very casual wave of her hand. Oh of course. How silly of me.

And you know the little sister wants to be just like her.

Played around with my ISO and White Balance, holy yellow skin batman! Oh well, it's fun to play and it's usually the best way to learn something new and by now we all know how lazy I am about editing, so yellow skin it is. Life is a work in progress, yes?

Had another play date yesterday. Reminders of how important family is and just how lucky we are.

***Every time I see Ethan he is grinning from ear to ear!***

Meanwhile Saoirse was having conflicting emotions, poor bunny.

Reminders. They are in fact everywhere, you just have to decide what it is that you are looking for.

Stretching Out

2011-06-28T06:38:00.000-05:00

Summer means sneaking off with the man of your dreams to the tiniest hole in the wall for an afternoon date over a bowl of soup.

Summer also means that the days all start to blend together and stretch out long and lazy.

I was afraid that if I waited any longer to post again that I might just stop forever. The pictures have been piling up, the adventures accumulating and of course time slows down for no one, not even a busy mother.

Summer means duck tape.

And melting popsicles in sidewalk cracks.

Summer means swim suits and bare feet.

And my baby girl celebrating another year.

Summer means growing pains.

And sitting on the stoop.

Summer means splashing.

Remember when you were a kid and summer stretched on forever?

You

2011-05-20T14:40:00.001-05:00

Today is absolutely beautiful. The trees are in bloom, there are white whispy clouds streaming across the blue skies and a warm breeze is dancing through the grass. Today I will celebrate you.

I made you a list of promises that I've been working on. A list that seems silly now when I read over it, and I'm not even sure how to measure my success in living up to each item. I'm not done, but I promise that I'm still not done trying either.

I've made a hundred more promises to you since then and I'm going to fulfill those as well.

You are Beauty. I want you to know that you take my breathe away, but it's a good kind of breathlessness.

You are Joy. I want you to know how much joy you bring to my heart and that I am ready to let the light in.

You are Hope. I want you to know that you are my reminder of every wish I ever had for you.

You are Laughter. I want you to know that laughter is contagious and healing, it's a special type of love song with a very powerful impact.

You are Grace. I want you to know that even though I stumble sometimes, I am striving for balance so that I might be graceful too.

You are Forgiveness. I want you to know that forgiveness can set you free.

You are Patience. I want you to know that I am forever grateful for everything you have taught me.

You are Home. I want you to know that you are and always will be a part of this home.

You are Everything. I want you to know that we are all connected.

You are Love. I want you to know that every day, every moment, every breath I love you. Today. Yesterday. Tomorrow. Always. I love because of You.

The Drill

2011-05-18T09:04:00.007-05:00

We are holed up today. It's cold and rainy outside, Nuala has a fever, Oscar has a trip to the museum planned in an elaborate day dream, the baby has underwear and I've got a cup of coffee.

I've been so busy lately that I haven't even been taking pictures. None. In fact this morning I realized that I can't even remember the last time I turned my camera on. I will work on this. I will take pictures today.

Or tomorrow.

Micah is finishing up a nice 10 day antibiotic treatment. Never mentioned it here, but he was really starting to worry me after about 5 weeks of on again off again illness. To the point that I actually started taking him to see our pediatrician. I never take sick kids to the doctor, but he was really starting to make me nervous. You know when there is something wrong. As a parent you just know.

He's feeling much better, fingers crossed that this first round took care of the strep, and we just started probiotics to hopefully replenish all that nice healthy bacteria that the medicine did away with.

Otherwise, it's just standard stuff around these parts. Hide and go seek. Games. Laughter. Tears. Hugs. You know the drill.

The knitting has been put down, I think all those leg warmers did me in, or the beret I made over and over again in 5 different colors. Turns out I only really like one of them. I'm glad I was able to flex and stretch my knitting muscles this winter though and lovely creations like this hat make me realize just how much I enjoy my needles.

Big kids. Big changes on the horizon.

Busted.

I know I say it all the time, but I will say it again (in fact I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever stop saying it) and again and again. Kids grow up way too fast.

Maija just got back from a class trip to NYC. She had a great time and I'm pretty sure that even though a few things went wrong (broken iPod anyone?) she will remember the good things from her adventure.

I can say this with confidence because she already informed me that she plans to go again next year.

Lots of trains in the living room right now. After rearranging the furniture a few months ago we wound up with a fairly decent amount of empty floor space. I'm still puzzled about what to do with it, but for now the tracks are taking over.

My ankle is not 100%, but it has improved dramatically and I am pretty much on track with my weekly marathon training. Nearly all of my "free" time lately has been devoted to preparing for July 31st. I can't tell you how supportive Brendan has been through this. Training takes a lot of time and it takes me away from my family, I wouldn't be able to do it without his support and I feel incredibly blessed to have him cheering me on along the way.

I'm not sure if I have ever told you how much I love yoga, but it's true, I love it. I am thankful for my practice every day (or at least once a week) and honestly believe that it makes me stronger in nearly every aspect of my life. Last fall I found a "teacher" who I absolutely adore and a few months ago she asked me to write up a little "student of the month" blurb for her studio's monthly newsletter. Here's what I came up with.....

"After the birth of my youngest daughter in June 2009, I decided that I was ready for a change. Tired of feeling run down and fatigued all the time, I could no longer deny that I was overweight, obese even, and that I needed to start focusing on my health. I began eating smaller portions and fresher foods and then joined a gym and started working out. Within 4 short months I had lost nearly 40 pounds and decided to train for a sprint triathlon while also signing up for a handful of 5K’s just for fun. Yoga quickly became a “side kick” to my rigorous running schedule, an easy way for me to supplement my training with something other than mileage. I liked it well enough to set my alarm for 5am in order to catch an early class and still make it home in time for breakfast with my family. I liked it well enough to buy my own mat and start memorizing the names of some of the poses, but back in those early days I had a very narrow idea of what yoga meant to me and I choose to incorporate it into my life in a very limited way. I was, after all, a runner and a new one at that. Inexperience meant that I still had a lot to learn about the virtues of cross training and the importance of being a well rounded and balanced athlete.

Then in the fall of 2010 two events occurred that changed my approach and appreciation of yoga. The first of which was that I suffered the loss of a loved one and had a very difficult time handling my grief. I wanted to put on a brave face for my family, but inside I was falling apart. My gym membership was put on hold, my late night ice cream binges were at an all time high and my yoga mat began collecting dust in the back of the closet. I even stopped running.

The second event occurred when I accidentally stumbled upon a new yoga instructor, who was none other than Shayne Broadwell. After weeks of making it through the days in ‘bare minimum’ mode and feeling like I was barely surviving, I decided on a whim to take my gym membership off of hold and try a few classes. I was emotionally exhausted from battling my grief and I remember during my first session with her she asked the class, “What are you holding on to?” and then she gave us permission to let it go. I actually cried on my mat that day as I began to realize that my practice could become the place of safety and healing that I had not been able to find elsewhere. Even after my previous experience with various yoga classes and instructors, I’d never had anyone lead the way as gracefully and powerfully as Shayne did. It was with her guidance that I began to see that yoga was going to be so much more than just another “work out”, it was going to become an important part of my overall health; mind, body and spirit.

I playfully tell people that yoga is my therapy, and in a way it is because it has helped me find a sense of inner peace and balance that I strive to share with the world around me. The fact that it has also made me a stronger runner is just a bonus! I am currently training for the San Francisco Marathon and I intend to use yoga to help me get across all 26.2 of those miles."

Core Essence Yoga is the name of her studio and she offers classes every day of the week. I can't say enough good things about this studio so go check it out, you will not be disappointed. I'm about to head out for a run now, happy Wednesday everyone.

Maija's Birthday

2011-05-09T08:26:00.007-05:00

13.

My daughter, my first born baby girl is now 13 years old.

I don't have a lot to say about this because it is still sort of sinking in and I may be in a bit of denial over the whole thing.

Because I swear she was just as tiny as Saoirse not 3 seconds ago and who exactly does time think it is anyways, taking my baby girl and rushing her childhood right along?

Please.Slow.Down.

Her four grown-ups (parents and step parents) gave her a group gift this year and so we met at the park to give it to her.

At first she thought it was just another purse...

Until upon further review she found something special inside.

I may have mentioned this before, but Maija listens to music non-stop. Needless to say she was thrilled with her new iPod.

She requested an apple pie instead of a cake and it was still piping hot and fresh from the oven when we sat down to sing, much too hot for candles so we improvised with a donut and then we all had a slice of pie. A la mode.

I love you baby girl, bag lady and all. Someday we'll be old and wrinkly together (yes, even you) and I'll tell you a hundred stories about what it was like being your mom and just how lucky I felt every step of the way.

37

2011-04-15T22:43:00.015-05:00

Spring is almost here. After a pretty miserable week of grey skies and rain clouds we have a little sunshine today and reminders of what is waiting for us just around the corner. May is one of my favorites, it always has been, and I think I'm ready for it.

A few weeks ago we had our first warm weather venture into the park.

It's getting a little bit tricky to find family field trips that everyone can truly enjoy and the age gap is becoming a bit more obvious as it begins to present obstacles. Yet, I wouldn't change anything and it's really amazing to see the dynamic between these kids. Watching their balance shift and sway as they grow, I am reminded daily just how incredible they are.

Maija pushed Saoirse on this scooter nearly all the way there and Saoirse felt like she was in heaven, you should of seen the way she puffed her chest out while clinging to the handle bars.

You know you have a big family when....

You leave 'No Vacancy" signs at the swing set.

We hosted Easter this year and it was lovely. Lots of music.

There is something sort of, well, just wonderful about having your living room full of music. And our house is pretty noisy and lively on any given day, but this was really special and I feel blessed to have this and to share it with you all.

I know I've been missing in action around here and this time I won't make any silly promises about how it won't happen again, because let's face it, it will. There is just so much to juggle and simply not enough time in any given day to fit everything in and that's okay, it is, and if this blog gets a bit dusty from time to time, it usually just means that our real daily life must be kicking it up an extra gear.

There is a lot to explore after all...

And as I often like to point out, there is just so much beauty in everything and sometimes you need to slow down, take a step back and really try to be in the moment because the moment is breathtaking.

I will remind myself of this everyday and I will cuddle up to these beautiful moments as often as I can. It's been a long winter and I am more than ready for a new season.

Spring Means...

2011-04-14T13:59:00.007-05:00

Birthdays. Spring means birthdays around here and Micah is officially eight years old now. He sort of got jipped this year because he was sick as a dog on his actual birthday day and so was I (oh, and so was Oscar. And Saoirse...it was a difficult week). We literally laid around in my bed all day, all of us, and slept or tried to. We watched PBS Kids for 100 hours straight and barely spoke a word to one another. It wiped us out. So. Yeah. His birthday pretty much sucked.

Luckily we were feeling better by the end of the week and birthday cake is still delicious even if it's not technically your day of birth. Even if it's a lousy store bought cake because your mom was still recovering. Even if.

Plus Micah's favorite cousin came over to celebrate with us, and that practically made up for everything. In fact, I'm almost positive it more than made up for it.

Then we did it all over again the next night. This time a joint cake for the boys, whose birthdays fall within just a few days of each other.

Brendan's birthday is coming up in the next week and he got an early present....

Father son banjos, is that like the coolest thing you've ever heard of? Just look at these handsome boys and their beautiful banjos.

Other than that, life has been scooting along at a pretty fast pace. It's just pure chaos at times actually, yet we still manage our weekly coffee dates just the Mr. and Mrs. I've been working on a cute little knitting project.

Baby leg warmers.....

On account of there is this wonderful lady I know and love who is having a baby! Yvonne's shower was a few weeks ago and we joined together to celebrate the only way we know how. Food, drink, merriment, obsene amounts of "oooohhhing and ahhhing" over adorable baby paraphernalia and of course tons of laughter and love to go around.

Did I mention the cake?

Lemon poppy seed and pretty much to die for, it was so good!

Anyways, here we are at Friday again and the morning was a whirl wind. I got up at 4:45am to get to the gym for an early Spin class followed by an hour of weight lifting. My ankle is no where near healed and I'm teetering between acceptance and nervous break down, haven't made up my mind yet on that but I'll let you know right away once it's official. I had built up my running endurance to about 75 minutes a stretch, and now I'm back down to zero, which is why I seem to be filling the cardio space with a ton of classes.

But really I just want to run. Going to stop here because even just typing this out is pushing me closer to the nervous break down side of things. Sigh.

In all honesty what I should probably do in order to completely rehab this ankle is stop all exercise for a while (did I just say that out loud?!). Crud.

Happy weekends all. If you need me I'll be at the gym in utter denial.

Fifteen

2011-03-31T10:06:00.008-05:00

I'm a bit late to the party.....but how can it be that there is now a 15 year old living in our house? Last week was Finn's birthday and we celebrated with a giant cake. Birthdays around here mean that you get to pick out the cake and of course write the dinner menu. He choose chocolate and vanilla for the cake and we all went out for a sushi dinner.

If you look closely enough at the cake, you can see how Nuala helped with pretty much every layer......see the nibbles?

Saoirse was also a big help in the kitchen, she stood on a stool at the counter the entire time I was frosting the cake and I kept hearing her saying "Mmmmmmm" in between long drawn out sighs that sounded sort of day dreamy. It took me a little while to figure out what she was up to.

Frosting and renegade powdered sugar and tiny fingers just the right size for cleaning the counter tops with. Yum.

Don't worry, there was still plenty of frosting left for the cake and the birthday boy.

I know I say this every time another birthday rolls around, and that's pretty often in this house, but how can it be? How can it be that this little boy is now a young man?

How is it that childhood seems to slip away so quickly? It really does seem like he was just 7 years old and yet here we are closer to college than grade school and while my heart is overflowing with love and pride and awe, I am still in a bit of shock that this is the same child I met over 7 years ago.

We got him an iPod Touch, something I'm sure most of his friends have already had for ages, and he seemed excited about it. Now we just have to load it up with all the coolest games.

Happy birthday Finn, I hope that you know how incredible and special you are, not only to me, but to everyone in this family.

Hmmmm....what else, I'm just going to play a quick game of "catch up" here and pretend like I haven't been blog slacking for the past 2 weeks. Micah had a sock hop at his school last week. We slicked his hair back and he looked pretty cool in his jeans and white t-shirt.

The girls had "crazy hair and sock" day at their school that same day and while at first they were skeptical about my vision for Sidhe's hair, it wound up being a big success. In fact when they returned home that afternoon, Maija asked me to do hers the same way.

Apparently the wig didn't go over as well as the big buns did, although it was pretty crazy.

Other than that, it's just life as usual around here.

There's always something to do. Like, help mom make lentil soup perhaps?

Well, soup and cookie bars....

Maija is pretty awesome in the kitchen.

She even let's Nuala help.

I wish I had a mouthful of graceful words to add to this photo sequence, something inspired and shiny, because this moment in the kitchen, watching my daughters stirring soup together was exactly that; shiny. But I don't and I'll just say that this was yet another reminder of all the beauty in life that I have to be grateful for, because there is in fact beauty to be found nearly everywhere, even in lentils.

I wish I could protect all of these little people from all of the heartbreak that the world will inevitably toss their way. I wish I could take away the heartbreak that they've already encountered so far. I know this is impossible. I know that it's a silly thing to wish for, but my instincts as a mother and a step mother tell me to protect, I can't help it. I wonder if you always feel that way about your children, even after they're long grown and out building lives of their own?

Jumping

2011-03-18T13:40:00.011-05:00

In honor of St. Pat's, we finally decided to take down the Valentine's Day decorations, but don't worry there are still plenty of hearts hanging around in our living room.

The kids were more than happy to lend a hand and we spent a lazy morning last week snipping and drawing and tracing away.

We even painted shamrocks and hearts and Saoirse was finally able to get a hold of a paintbrush. She took it very seriously.

Good morning green pancakes.

We started the day off with these little beauties, and I made sure that everything in Micah's cold lunch was either green or orange, which was actually easier than I thought it would be.

The babies had some friends over for a play date and one of the other moms brought this delicious creation along.....

There was frosting everywhere of course.

I thought it was fitting that we had to do Ruari's rain forest project that afternoon and that it was also green and orange. Perfect.

We like to put these things off until the very last minute (not good) but we always find a way to pull it together in the end (good).

And then of course we had a giant feast. Corned beef, potatoes two ways, cabbage, salad and soda bread. It was loud and hectic and delicious and just perfect in every way as 12 of us gathered around the table to celebrate.

Saoirse helped with clean up duties.

This post has been sitting here for a while now, as I am running a bit behind. I can always tell when one area of my life is getting a good deal of attention because it usually always means that other areas are barely getting enough. I've been focusing on health again lately and spending a bit of time at the gym. Now that my ankle is healing it is time to get back in shape, official marathon training starts this Sunday.

As I was leaving the gym last week there was a mom with three small children walking out with us, her kids must have been 3,1 and 4 months old~they were YOUNG, and she was at her wits end. She had the baby in a stroller and then had the other 2 walking on either side of her. She actually yelled at the oldest, who again could not have been more than 3 years old, for jumping.

"Stop JUMPING, you need to walk nice!"......I cringed a little bit, not only because of the absurdity, but because it could have very well been something I would have said (or still might) when trying to wrangle 3 small children in a parking lot. Stop jumping. Really?

I wanted to hug that mom right on the spot and tell her to stop yelling at her kids and maybe get a triple stroller, heck I was about ready to just give her mine. Everyone should have a decent 'nanny', especially in a parking lot.

I offered her a smile but she was not in the mood for such a gesture and I didn't take it personally. Having kids is hard, especially three kids all in a row. We're just now starting to move out of the baby phase around here and I am amazed at how much easier things are getting. I sort of always knew that this would happen, that the babies would ease up just in time for things to start getting complicated with the teenagers, but for now we're on a nice peaceful stretch and I'm going to enjoy it for as long as I can while reminding everyone to jump as much as possible.

I got up at 5am today and went to a spin class at the YMCA. Which is just a fancy way of saying stationary bike ride as far as I can tell, but it was a great workout and it will probably be the only "alone" time I get today so it was worth it. Plus now I get to spend the rest of the day with this silly thing, and who wouldn't want to do that?

For as much work as parenting is, for as tired and crabby and impatient as I become, there is nothing else I would want to be doing right now. Honestly. I feel so blessed and grateful that this is where I am in my life right this very moment.

I've been working on making Fridays our homemade pizza night and it looks sort of like this....

I was able to avoid eating 100 slices this time around by making a giant salad as well.

And just because I know you were wondering, I finally finally finally made it back to yoga class last Friday. Words can't even describe how great it felt. Yoga has been such a consistent part of my over all health and well being for the past year and to have a 6 week absence was tough. My instructor asked me to be the "student of the month" in her studio's upcoming newsletter and so I have to figure out what to write for that, something along the lines of why I got into yoga and what it has meant to me. Seems pretty easy, right? Except yoga has meant so much more to me than just a "workout" and I'm not sure how to put that into words exactly and not only that but my practice has been so powerfully impacted by Shayne's (that's her name, the instructor I adore) guidance that I can't even credit it all to yoga. I've had other instructors who paled in comparison to her influence.

Dear Shayne,

You came into my life when my heart was broken and you helped me put the pieces back together. You guided me along a path of recovery in a way that no one else was able to. You gave me permission to let go of my sorrow and to move forward with out shame. It wasn't just yoga, it was you. Without even knowing it, you played a pivotal role in helping me heal myself, and I could never tell you, even if I tried, just how much this has meant to me, how much I needed your guidance, but from the bottom of my heart I am so very grateful. Thank you for showing me the way back to my joy.

Now, I really need to get going, there are babies to dress and brush and dear cousins on their way here right this very second for a relaxing morning play date. It's super rainy out but I can smell zucchini bread baking away in the oven and a fresh pot of coffee brewing and life is good, rain and all. Now go jump your little heart out.

Randoms

2011-03-11T14:34:00.009-06:00

Nothing much new, pretty content with the status quo right now and that's alright with me. I'm fairly certain that it's just fine with little Miss Sticky Fingers too, because when pancakes are a part of the grind you just find a way to make do. Yep. More pancakes and I'm alright with it. I've been trying to find a balance for months now, to find a period of equilibrium and if that means a standing invitation for Mrs. Buttersworth at the breakfast table so be it.

No pancakes for me though, I need to start getting serious about getting in shape for the marathon that I keep talking about and not training for. I've even resumed my training journal. Yes, people still journal on actual paper.

It's sort of like scrap booking, but not as pretty or expensive.

I keep waiting for Cupid to come and clean up his mess.....Turns out he's a naughty good for nothing. (Just kidding Cupid, I love you, yay hearts!)

We had our homemade pizza night on Friday and I promised myself that I was only going to have 2 slices, I even wrote about it in the above journal ahead of time to make it 'official', and then I failed miserably. 20 slices of sheer misery.

I tried to make up for it by buying enough veggies to feed a small army, wonder where I can find one of those? Look at all this nutrition, and for less than $6 at our neighborhood market.

We did some morning art today and the twins loved it. I should do morning art with them every morning, you'd think that I'd be better at it seeing as how I'm sort of artsy fartsy. I think part of the challenge is that I really just want to give them materials for pure process art and not get too project-y with it, but maybe that gets boring after a while? I dunno. Excuses.

Poor Saoirse was stuck with crayons though. She fussed about this injustice for a few minutes and then set to work creating a masterpiece, and before you go getting all bent out of shape for her, she was offered a turn at the paint station once Nuala was done, but she declined.

And since today is obviously just a mish mash of random bits and pieces, I will leave you with this sweet little lady. Oh I could go on and on about her. She is something else I tell ya, so fierce and independent and just, well, fearless in a good way.

Super silly too, which I absolutely love about her.

Pictureless Bits~

*Saoirse is talking up a storm lately and copying pretty much anything you say.

*We're getting ready to list our house, the one we moved out of for a 3 week renovation 3 years ago, so if you know anyone who wants a cute bungalow on one of the best streets in the city send them our way.

*Maija is going to State for forensics and Sidhe got a blue ribbon at the last meet. They worked really hard this season and we're super proud of them.

*Finn switched out of group discussion and back into prose, he was very happy with his scores this weekend. He needs a haircut.

*The girls keep having sleepovers and fun dates with friends and rarely a weekend goes by now without them having plans.

*I went for my first post-sprain run yesterday and thought it was great. My ankle seems to think otherwise today. Awesome.

*It's gorgeous outside today and I think I'm about to load up the helmets and bike to pick up the twins from school. Enjoy the sunshine lovelies.

****I did it, I got out the bike and rode to pick up the twins from preschool with Saoirse in her little bucket seat on the handlebars ( I love our iBert baby seat, it's like I'm holding her while we ride) and the twin's trailer behind us. Getting there was just fine. Getting home was a totally different story, involving a whole lot of first gear and heavy breathing. Saoirse actually started imitating me about half way along the route (which if you must know is probably less than 3 miles) and it must have been hilarious for any onlookers to hear the both of us grunting and panting our way along, but it was totally worth it! I cannot believe how hard it is to drag 100 pounds of baby around on that thing, that or I am just way out of shape.....****

More To Love

2011-03-06T13:19:00.017-06:00

We had a fairly routine weekend around here. Normal and predictable. Boring even. With schedules to juggle and chores to complete and night time babies to hush. Bellies to fill, hair to wash, teeth to brush, clothes to change, books to read, reminders to give, naps to take, imaginations to feed and time to share. All while taking phone calls, sorting mail, buying groceries, paying bills and making yet another to do list. Yes, just another boring weekend around here.

I am of the opinion that boring can be very satisfying if you just give it a chance.

Because this is it, this is the life we have carved out for ourselves. All these moments will combine to build the lifetime of memories that I will look back on and ache for thirty years from now when I finally have the little bit of stillness I so desperately think I want at times. These are the moments we are building our future with even if they occasionally feel worn and predictable.

Experience has shown me that there is comfort in predictability.

There is something to be said for the structure of your routine. Beauty is waiting for you in the rituals you hold dear.

Even if it's just something as simple as chocolate chip pancakes and bacon for breakfast.

Normal and ordinary can feed your soul if you allow them to, and after a low key weekend I am once again reminded that my ordinary is really quite extraordinary. Sometimes the pressure of daily life can be a bit overwhelming, but it's important to remember just how lucky we are. I am amazed that this is my life. Amazed and grateful.

Here are the photos that got properly edited and then mishandled during a transfer and then edited again post edit and ultimately destroyed in the process. Oh well, maybe I'll take a class or something, but in the meantime the tutu that Sydney gave Saoirse is simply too cute not to make the cut.

And who could forget the fish hat she brought Nuala for her birthday? I swear Sydney always delivers the best accessories ever.

But I am at my most comfortable with natural light.

I love watching these kids look for little treasures during the day.

Even if it's just a lens cap and a Charlie Brown.

Even if it's just searching through the same old toy basket with the hope of finding something new. Searching through all that is predictable and dusty and piecing it back together in a way that is new and refreshing.

Like snacking on a yummy croissant that you forgot was waiting for you.

Or finding an itty bitty pancake flipper and then carrying it around with you all day long as if it is the coolest thing you've ever seen in your whole life.

A wise man once reminded me that there is in fact beauty in everything, he sure wasn't joking around either. I was a bit skeptical at the time, but I am so glad that he was right.

As for the camera shy teenagers? I've been much more adamant about getting all paparazzi on them lately.

And what's more beautiful than that?

Yes, our weekend was normal and ordinary and just about as plain jane as they come, and I wouldn't want it any other way. There really is more to love if you just look in the right places.

One Final Recital

2011-03-03T22:26:00.008-06:00

Maija has been taking dance lessons at the same studio since she was four years old, which was long enough ago that I don't even have any digital photos of those first few years (way back then we used this nifty little stuff called film). I can still remember her first recital very clearly. She wore head to toe pink and a shy smile to match, but watching her up on that stage you could see her confidence starting to grow under all those spotlights. And through the years that confidence has continued to grow with the help of her ballet slippers and tap shoes.

We were sad to learn recently that the studio is closing and this year's recital would be the last. Well ok, I was a little sad but Maija was sort of devastated and at first I thought that she was possibly over reacting (wonder who she gets that from) until I remembered that this place has been a part of her life for as long as she can remember. There will be a new studio and new lessons in her future, but it's still hard to close a chapter even with the promise of a new one on the horizon.

Last night we gently closed the pages with one final recital.

And it was amazing. You should have seen her. The ballet number was beautiful and sweet, but the tap routine was just.....wow, this girl loves her tap shoes. She might not like me saying this, but at one point in the routine she actually fell, as in flat on her face. Fell as in I actually caught my breath in my chest a little, nearly dropped my camera and fought the urge to jump up and run onto the stage. But just as quickly as she fell she found her feet again and with a brilliant smile (and a bit of laughter) she finished the dance as if nothing had happened. Remember the shy four year old? Yeah, well she's long gone and in her shoes stands a poised and confident young lady who is up for the challenge of just about anything, because not everyone can fall flat on their face and recover so gracefully.

The recital was lovely. She performed in three numbers total, ballet, tap and jazz, and while they were wonderful, it's the fall that I'm going to remember because it led to the whole picking herself back up part and that's the part that brought joy to my heart. Once again she is the teacher and I am the student and I am mesmerized as always. She is mine and I can hardly believe it. She was the first one to show me what being a mother feels like, the first one to show me what that love could do to you. She is mine and I am eternally grateful.

She is also ours and I am thankful for that as well. She wouldn't be who she is without the solid love and support that we have given her over the years. All of us.

So there you have it the final pages of this chapter. We're already looking at new studios so I'm sure that there will be more tap shoes and jazz hands to come.

Left Overs

2011-03-03T11:33:00.009-06:00

Three little bellies full of lunch and here's what is left over.

Here are a few of my left overs....

*I call Maija "My". Micah started this when he was teeny tiny. It stuck and I like it. A lot.

*Oscar likes tags. I made him a tag blankie from scratch when he was a baby, it's cute and fuzzy, has a lot of colorful tags (folded ribbons) sewn into it. He doesn't like it at all. He really likes tags put on in factories, especially if they have wash instructions on them. He has started memorizing which of his shirts have tags on the side seam, the tags are low enough that he can reach them whenever he needs to. He likes to hold them and doesn't seem to mind if his shirt flips up a tad or if his belly shows a little. This tag business started with 5 store bought baby blankets. He rubbed one of the tags between his fingers for so long that the tag fell off. He no longer has any interest in the tagless blanket. There are still 4 acceptable blankets left and he wants to sleep with at least two of them. He's not partial to any of them, just wants one for each hand. I'm not sure how I feel about this.

*Micah has the longest school day of anyone here. He's out the door by 6:40am and he doesn't get home until 4pm. I don't have time to contemplate Oscar's obsession with tags because most of my "auxiliary" worry time is spent wondering about my 7 year old's nine and a half hour school day.

*Ruari is switching schools next year, she'll be going to the middle school that Finn, Sidhe and Maija have all attended. I'm sick to my stomach though about the budget cuts that our schools are going to be facing as I'm not sure that they have much left to give and it makes me sick. Sick and angry. Education should be one of our top priorities.

*I shot all my pictures today in RAW. Supposedly it makes post editing a lot easier. And it did, but Photobucket didn't like it and got a bit snotty with me after I had already done all the extra work and now the images don't even look remotely close to how they were supposed to. Plus I remembered that I don't even like post editing, because I simply don't have the time for it. And now I've spent way TOO long editing photos that look worse than they did originally, if that makes any sense. Grrrrrr.

*Finn's Spanish teacher is giving him a C. Finn has earned A's in all his other classes so far. I'm not sure what he's earning in Spanish but I do believe that she is giving him a C. That's not really fair if it's not what he has earned. Double Grrrrrr.

*I'm thinking about doing a half marathon on April 9th, but my ankle is still healing and there won't be a lot of time to train for it. I know in my head that it's a ridiculous, preposterous, silly idea but it's there in my heart anyways.

*Juggling. Still doing it, still lousy at it, hopeful that I'll get better at it soon.

*Hopeful.

Tutus and Trains

2011-02-28T12:46:00.001-06:00

If your daughter insisted upon wearing a giant tulle tutu to the Domes, and the thing was so poofy and ridiculous that you could barely buckle her carseat straps around it and for a few seconds you actually wondered if it would block the aisles and walkways for the other visitors but you just didn't have the heart to tell her "no".....

Well, if your daughter did that, wouldn't you want to take a hundred pictures too?

100 Fingers 100 Toes

Merry Christmas!!! *Rapid Recap*

Salvation

Fall Hair Updates And Other Nonsense

The Harvest

Easy

Wordless Wednesday

Real Quick

Worth It

Wordless Wednesday

100 Pictures

The Good Life

Super Readers

Home

Beach Bums

Making Peace

This Morning

Reminders

Stretching Out

You

The Drill

Maija's Birthday

37

Spring Means...

Fifteen

Jumping

Randoms

More To Love

One Final Recital

Left Overs

Tutus and Trains

Merry Christmas!!! Rapid Recap