Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Hurdles and Confidence

1. Oscar is smart. All of our kids are smart, including yours, and I think that kids are just pretty much generally amazing, talented, unique creatures. I learn so much from my kids, our kids, your kids, ALL kids.

2. I have to be able to say that Oscar is smart without it taking anything away from how incredibly smart and special all the other kids are.

3. I've had a lot of experience with kids. He's number 4 biologically and number 7 in the grand tally, so I know a thing or two about kids. I'm certainly no expert and I would never in a million years claim to be, but I have learned a lot during my years of hard work.

4. I need to explain that when I am talking about Oscar and his smartness, I am not in fact trying to be a braggy mick bragster who wants to show off at the playground in front of all the other moms.

5. I am in all actuality feeling rather overwhelmed lately about Oscar and all of his smarty pants-ness. Scared that his talents will undoubtedly include various other hurdles. Big ones. And I know that's life, that's the balance, but....

6. Here's the thing: I enjoy feeling confident in my parenting, in my capabilities, who doesn't? We all strive for that confidence in pretty much every facet of our lives, and we gain it in small measures by learning as much as we can. Let's face it, the majority of my life right now is in fact parenting and I am striving for it baby, I am trying to learn.

7. This is new to me, this is uncharted territory, and I can't do it without help. I think lately my attempts in asking for it have been misunderstood, and for this I am sorry as it was never my intention to hurt feelings along the way, but I am learning as I go.

8. Oscar is smart and I worry about him. I worry about my abilities to parent him with confidence.

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